When every person seems to have something better than you
I was scrolling through Instagram the other day.
First pic - some of my friends chilling at the beach. When I haven't been to the beach in a long time.
Second pic - my friend sharing about her perfect relationship with her boyfriend. When I haven't been over my crush for ages.
Third pic - Damn! She got a new house! Awww.. that's beautiful. When I haven't...
You know what?
I am never going to be enough. No matter how hard I try, there is always someone who has something better than what I have. Sometimes I feel so miserable thinking about this. Comparing my life with others and knowing all the things I lack.
It was different when I was in school, social media wasn't that active and it was easy to live. There was not much distraction. And even if we didn't have so much "stuff" to show, we weren't reminded of the fact that we don't have it quite often. But these days! Damn it's hard to be online these days, all the time you are bombarded with shiny things, sometimes you don't even think while purchasing stuff only to regret later what you brought.
These days you are always reminded of the fact that you don't have the perfect relationship, the perfect house, the perfect vacation, and everything in between.
When the lockdown started in 2020, I found myself using social media for longer periods of time. And it was exhausting, mentally. Using social media is fun only when you don't spend the entire day on it.
Let's face it. We cannot stay away from social media for a long time. (Some people can, and that's good I guess… but not everyone, not most people)
Some people have their own businesses to run online and to be honest there is also a lot of good information you can get easily online. But then there is also social media comparison that creeps in and kills your happy vibe and makes you sulk even more.
I was thinking about this and I said to myself - Vrunda, you are a positive psychologist. Think. Think about what you can do to stop this. You know overthinking can get out of control sometimes and you need to stop that. Think about which concept of Positive Psychology can help now…
That's when I realized that what I need right now is not another fancy house or a vacation, but gratitude. Heartfelt gratitude for all the good things that I already have in my life.
I may not have a fancy house, but I do have lots of happy memories from this one. I may not go on a long vacation but I do have fun with my friends here. And what matters is that they are always there for me when I need them. That is something that really counts. I am so grateful to have them with me.
And as you can see, this is how you can shift your vibration. This is how you can deal with social media comparison. With gratitude. Heartfelt gratitude. For everything you have, for everything you are blessed with. Remember the good things you have now that you didn't have last year, reflect on how you have grown and changed for the better.
Think about what good you have in your life and cherish it. Appreciate it. Be grateful for it.
Here's the gift of gratitude: In order to feel it, your ego has to take a backseat. What shows up in its place is greater compassion and understanding. Instead of being frustrated, you choose appreciation. And the more grateful you become , the more you have to be grateful for.
- Oprah Winfrey